Freudenfreude

Freudenfreude is a German term that translates to "Joy of Joy." It’s commonly used to express the feeling of being happy for someone else's happiness. In a particularly lost time in my life, when I was searching for anything to put me back on track, I didn’t know what I needed. I had been working hard and finding relative success, but I was miserable with who I had become. I felt disconnected from myself, lost in the work I was doing. Just when I thought I was on the verge of a breakdown, I took a step back and started searching for answers.

In the past, whenever I felt lost, I would always turn to my mom for guidance—she has always been an incredible guide in my life. I had prepared to have a conversation with her to share how lost I felt, but something unexpected happened. As I came home from a workout and walked into my mom’s house, I heard her laughing. It was a stark contrast to the silence that had filled the house in the previous year, a silence I had grown accustomed to.

Hearing that laugh was the answer I had been searching for—she was happy. An overwhelming sense of appreciation washed over me, and I realized that I no longer needed the conversation I had planned. Her joy was enough. Her happiness stemmed from her partner, Chuck, who has become a significant figure in my life. Now, when I come home and hear that laugh, see her smile, it fills me with more than just relief—it fills me with joy.

Watching her share her endless love with Chuck and his children has brought me a happiness I never expected. Even now, I continue to feel immense joy for her and for the new family we’ve become. If you’re reading this, I love you all. Your happiness has helped me find my own, and in that shared joy, I found myself.

Below is not my best work, but it is easily my favorite photo I’ve ever taken.